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What just happened?!

When Jake gets on Google he definitely does his research for trying to conceive (TTC). He keeps reminding me about how I need to take my prenatals and limit my caffeine intake. If anyone knows me, I need my 20 oz. every single day. If I don't I get headaches. Well this morning I made less coffee and I thought I gave myself half and apparently I didn't. I got a text this morning with Jake's coffee cup being half full saying, "Dude what the heck?" I thought it was funny.

Every day is one step closer. I've complained about the pain in my stomach where I received my shot two days ago. You can read about that process here. Now I have a bruise and it still hurts. It might actually hurt worse now. BUT I HAD THE CRAZIEST EXPERIENCE! I'm pretty sure I felt myself ovulate. Yes, you've read that correctly... I think I felt myself ovulate! I got the shot at 2:30pm on Tuesday and was told to "get to business" later that night and late Wednesday evening OR very early morning Thursday. I woke up at 3:36 this morning from a weird feeling on my right side where my ovary is. (That is 37 hours which is past the 36-36.5 hour average but it was so close I just knew it had to be.) The pain started high where my ovary is and felt like it was moving down. That's the only way I can describe it. It was the weirdest feeling I think I've ever experienced.

Being on medication and receiving shots just to get pregnant is absolutely crazy to me. It's crazy because this is a process women should be able to do naturally and I can't. I feel embarrassed being 24 having to ask for help. Another reason I think it's crazy is because I see so many people pin their children off on others so they can party and I'm over here struggling. I'll continue to pop my pills and prick myself with needles just to cross my fingers that I'll see those two lines in a few weeks. However, I can truly say being on the prescription side of things is a completely different experience. I thought it was bad emotionally trying for so long and getting hopeful thinking we did it, just to start my period four days late. It's not only a mental issue this time, it's physical. It's feeling like you're going to get sick because the medicine is giving you such bad headaches. It's not sleeping well because you know you could ovulate at any time. It's waking up in the middle of the night for uncomfortable pain where your right ovary should be. But every day is one step closer. It feels good knowing there is a plan. Although I'm struggling I know things are going to get better.

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. Mark 11:24

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